Eschew obfuscation

Forgive me Father… it’s been 34 hours since I slept. Not because of driving but after the weekend the first day back started with a 5am wake-up so by three in the afternoon I was still wide awake. Set off again after the mandatory break etc and have come full circle ready to go again tonight although I’m going to have a sleep first.

During the last 34 hours I’ve seen a car or two, actually hundreds! It occurred to me that a persons car says a lot about the person who owns it…

Take the first example: A rather over weight individual, similar to a heart attack shaped like a Big Mac and clad in a fluorescent yellow safety shirt ‘wrapper’ that could have possibly been two sizes larger but rather gives the appearance of a dead canary that went to an amateur taxidermist. He drives an elderly Datsun tray back ute which, like his shirt doesn’t really fit his sizable stature. Two dummy exhaust stacks protrude from the tray like a pair of phallic obelisk; the roof and running boards are festooned with amber marker lamps. From the overhead console (further reducing the over filled interior) dangle the tell tale curly cords for multiple CB radios that appear to have more antennae than could possibly be required. Chrome naked ladies and bitumen frying highway lights complete the package. Is this a frustrated truck driver or a B & S Bandit entombed in his grotesque sarcophagus?

Example Two: Buoyed by his air of success this flamboyant techno-whiz betrays his trade with his custom number plates ‘ITGURU’ affixed to either end of his shining black SS Commodore. He oozes success with his suited arm and cuff linked wrist resting casually on the windows edge as he cruises the Sydney streets. This is a man who knows what he wants… except he’s elected to take the wagon! Has he been pulled up by his own conscience or has the good wife insisted he buy a practical car?

Example Three: For the adventurous car owner among us nothing shouts ‘FUN WEEKEND!’ louder than a flash new four wheel drive. Look out city limits, come Friday it’s dirt roads and big sky country. Out there where the carbon sequestation has been going on for millenium their can be nothing more care-free than a man and his 4×4; that is unless he bought the hybrid powered option and will need to take a 6 kva generator to charge up the car! Who are you kidding, if you buy a hybrid why buy a bush basher unless you only go into the bush to bash duck shooters and wrap your arms around the carbon capture units or your idea of roughing it is a motel room in Katoomba.

Not sure what my beat up falcon wagon says about me!