Diary of a Truck Driver

For those of you that don’t know about CB radios and the like, just about every truck on the road is using one. Gone are the days of the “ten four good buddy” lingo of the 70′s and 80′s and the sets are now just about all UHF which gives a much clearer sound than the old AM sets.

Generally we all sit on channel 40 except when running the Pacific Highway (channel 29) and the Hume Highway (channel 15). It’s not all idle chit chat and any one having a long conversation will normally change down a couple of channels to leave the air clear for others or get told to do so.

Apart from the standard ‘road reports’ where announcments about police activities are relayed, the two-way radio is a great tool for passing slower moving vehicles with trucks further up the road calling back to say when the road is clear. So if you get overtaken when you think visibility is not good enough we are probably using someone else’s eyes to see a lot further than you think.

If you’re listening in on the 2-way, ignore the usual idiots around town who generate some perverse form of entertainment antagonising the passing truckers, and take time to figure out the terms used to advise of upcoming ‘hazards’. Phrases like ‘Candy Car’, and ‘double one’ refer to the Highway Patrol vehicles, whilst ‘Company Car’ is a general duties vehicle. ‘Barbie is cold’ means the weigh bridge is shut and the are various location references like ‘Sleepy Hill’ (Tuggerah exit on F3) and ‘Money Tree’ (there are a few of these) which can take a while to figure out. Other than that it can be quite interesting to listen to.

Whilst I’m on the subject of visibility; it surprises me how many vehicles hang around a truck in the blind spots either back near the trailer wheels or next to the passenger door. Both these places are potential death zones if the truck driver has lost track of the vehicles moving around him (or her). I often find myself wondering where a particular car has gone only to find them checking out the wheel nuts on the left hand side.

The other stupid thing drivers often do is go slow (below the posted speed) forcing me out into lane 2 or 3 and just as they see the bull-bar come along side their window they shoot off into the distance. I can only assume that until I drew along side them they were oblivious to my presence. Use your mirrors and your common sense and you may be around for a lot longer.

Forgive me Father… it’s been 34 hours since I slept. Not because of driving but after the weekend the first day back started with a 5am wake-up so by three in the afternoon I was still wide awake. Set off again after the mandatory break etc and have come full circle ready to go again tonight although I’m going to have a sleep first.

During the last 34 hours I’ve seen a car or two, actually hundreds! It occurred to me that a persons car says a lot about the person who owns it…

Take the first example: A rather over weight individual, similar to a heart attack shaped like a Big Mac and clad in a fluorescent yellow safety shirt ‘wrapper’ that could have possibly been two sizes larger but rather gives the appearance of a dead canary that went to an amateur taxidermist. He drives an elderly Datsun tray back ute which, like his shirt doesn’t really fit his sizable stature. Two dummy exhaust stacks protrude from the tray like a pair of phallic obelisk; the roof and running boards are festooned with amber marker lamps. From the overhead console (further reducing the over filled interior) dangle the tell tale curly cords for multiple CB radios that appear to have more antennae than could possibly be required. Chrome naked ladies and bitumen frying highway lights complete the package. Is this a frustrated truck driver or a B & S Bandit entombed in his grotesque sarcophagus?

Example Two: Buoyed by his air of success this flamboyant techno-whiz betrays his trade with his custom number plates ‘ITGURU’ affixed to either end of his shining black SS Commodore. He oozes success with his suited arm and cuff linked wrist resting casually on the windows edge as he cruises the Sydney streets. This is a man who knows what he wants… except he’s elected to take the wagon! Has he been pulled up by his own conscience or has the good wife insisted he buy a practical car?

Example Three: For the adventurous car owner among us nothing shouts ‘FUN WEEKEND!’ louder than a flash new four wheel drive. Look out city limits, come Friday it’s dirt roads and big sky country. Out there where the carbon sequestation has been going on for millenium their can be nothing more care-free than a man and his 4×4; that is unless he bought the hybrid powered option and will need to take a 6 kva generator to charge up the car! Who are you kidding, if you buy a hybrid why buy a bush basher unless you only go into the bush to bash duck shooters and wrap your arms around the carbon capture units or your idea of roughing it is a motel room in Katoomba.

Not sure what my beat up falcon wagon says about me!

I’m back on the express run out of Sydney tonight. It’s not the best run as you end up fairly tired, especially at the beginning of the week while you transition from the world of normal mortals toward the witching hour of the night life.

The upside is the run out of Sydney and up the F3 is fairly quiet and I have the road fairly well to myself once I skip off toward Cessnock. It makes the whole run about an hour quicker than it is during the day and even the run up Pennant Hills road is a breeze with speeds up around the 70 kph limit most of the way.

I’m also getting to see the same drivers each night so you start to say g’day to more people which helps to alleviate the fatigue induced by the odd hours.

The worst time is around 3am then the circadian rhythm tries hard to put you so sleep regardless of what you are doing. I’ll sometimes pull up somewhere and set the alarm for a fifteen minute sleep, it’s amazing how sound a sleep you can be in before the turbo timer turns the engine off and 15 minutes later you can wake up and be good to go for another few hours.

Sleep debt definitely builds though and by the end of the week I can be fairly well stuffed. But having done five trips to Sydney (about 4000km) with all the traffic should be fairly exhausting I guess. It’s no what I’d recommend as a hobby but as work goes the pays good and nobody really hassles me much, that’s life on the road for you.

The following story is about some brilliant individuals that thought it would be fun to throw a very large object through the windscreen of a vehicle.

I often struggle with the motivation of individuals that partake in such activities as graffiti etc but this sort of act is beyond my comprehension… what possible ‘fun’ could such an activity produce. I’ll bet if you asked them to lift a large rock as some form of gainful employment they’d refuse as it would be beneath their intelligence.

Here’s the article…Man injured in freeway rock throwing

It would appear that I have found my niche in life… well not exactly but I spent all last week doing the express run out of Sydney each night and have commenced a repetition of the same pattern this week so maybe this is my lot, at least for a while.

The worst bit about it is that I’m now out of synch with the rest of the world as I have to sleep each afternoon and leave Sydney at about 10pm. The upside is that I leave when the traffic is relatively quiet. The run out to the freeway still takes almost an hour but it’s a relatively relaxed drive at that time of night. It also means that I get a good run in for the week at around 4000 km’s. It’s hard to get five Sydney runs in a week when you’re not doing the express run as you loose too much time unloading and loading along the way.

I wake up in the evening, load up and head north with one drop along the way then head for home. Unloading courier freight is a really quick concern and the boys at Tamworth can strip my trailer bare and have me back out the gate in under 20 minutes which is pretty quick. My next trailer is already loaded up ready to go so I grab some fuel if need be and float back down the road.

Usually I’m back in Sydney parked up in around 14 hours and then it starts again.

I travelled 4500 km’s last week and stopped 26 times to load or unload. At an average of one hour to load that’s 26 hours, plus the kilometres at an average of 80 kph (56 hours) adds up to an 82 hour week. No wonder I was stuffed at the end of it.